The Lazy Mom's Baby Book

Usually I try to pick a theme for each post, something that hopefully other people can relate to. Other times, this is my written record of my kids’ milestones since I’m too lazy to fill out their baby books. Fair warning: this post is the second type.

I’ll start with Miles, my 3.5-year-old. Actually, more like 3.8 y.o. He just recently started to dress himself. I’m not sure where this streak of independence came from, but it might be an episode of Special Agent Oso called “License to Dress.”

If there are any Alias or Chuck fans out there who haven’t seen this show, you’ve got to check it out. Along with possibly the catchiest theme song on TV, it features a stuffed-animal spy whose missions involve helping kids learn to do things by themselves, like rake leaves or make a salad. Also, every show’s name is a take-off on a James Bond movie, like “For Your Pies Only” and “Tie Another Day.” Who says TV is all bad?

As you can imagine, Miles makes some interesting fashion choices. And yet I know he is by far not the only self-dressed, sartorially challenged preschooler, so I am always baffled when other parents point out that he’s wearing his pants backwards or his shoes on the wrong feet. Or inquire as to why he’s wearing, say, a parka with flip-flops. Do they think I had anything to do with that?! It's called PICKING YOUR BATTLES, people. I could care less as long as he’s not naked.

A far more annoying new habit of my son’s is refusing to eat at mealtimes and then claiming he’s ravenous at bedtime. I know, I know, I shouldn’t give in to this behavior. But the kid is nothing if not stubborn. Wonder where he gets that?

Moving on to Riley, also known as the loudest 14-month-old on the planet. True story: we were in Home Depot one time and he was grabbing things off the shelves I did not want him to have, like hand saws. When I took them away, he screeched his disapproval in his typical high-pitched, blood-curdling Riley way. Three people stopped in their tracks, thinking some kind of alarm had gone off. Imagine their surprise when they saw the tiny, sweet-faced source of the noise.

The child also eats like a trucker. For breakfast this morning, he had eggs, bacon, toast, a whole banana, and a few bites of oatmeal. No one can believe how much he packs away -- until they try to lift him. Should I worry that my baby has a binge-eating disorder? Or does he need all those calories to fuel his overly developed lungs?

He has been walking for 4 mos., and has now moved on to sprinting, tripping, and falling flat on his face. He’s not a big talker – he finds screaming to be a far more effective means of communication – but he does make sounds that are intended to be words. “Brrrrr,” for instance, means “more,” “moo” and possibly “shoe.” “Nana” means “banana” and also, food in general. “Dada” is another all-purpose word, and he has never, NOT ONCE even tried to say “Mama.” Thanks, buddy.

In general, the boys are getting along better and better. This leads to some very cute moments, like this one where Miles “reads” his little brother a bedtime story: