My Favorite Holiday Photos

Did everybody have a good Christmas? I hope so. Ours was very nice, despite the baby coming down with a monster cold and both kids waking us up WAY too early on Christmas morning. (To my surprise, the toddler was the one chomping at the bit to get downstairs, not the 4 y.o.)

But there's no denying that kids make the holidays a lot more fun. We're heading to the in-laws' tomorrow for a few days -- where they're predicting 20 in. of snow tomorrow!! -- so I'll leave you with a few of my favorite shots from Christmas day:

Aw, they DO love each other.

Finally I can do something about that 5 o'clock shadow.

Thomas the Tank Engine was a big hit with Riley, while Miles treated us
to his musical stylings on his new keyboard.

I love how this picture captures my life perfectly: an adult beverage
sitting on a book about underpants.

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A Crafty Christmas

It’s been well-documented here that I am no Martha Stewart. I have my moments, but you will never find me self-embossing gift tags with stamps, glitter, and some sort of mini blow torch. (For real -- I watched her Christmas special the other night.)

But the holidays bring out my crafty side. Or maybe it’s all that SUPER-CUTE, SUPER-CHEAP stuff in all the craft stores this time of year. Or maybe it’s the fact that I have to entertain a 4-y.o. who’s out of school for a ridiculously long Christmas break.

The first project we attempted was making paper snowflakes. It bombed. Turns out safety scissors don’t cut through layers of folded paper very well. Plus, Miles soon lost sight of our “white Christmas” theme and began decorating the snowflakes with Batman colors. Because what says winter wonderland better than a bunch of yellow and black snowflakes, right?

Next, we attempted graham cracker gingerbread houses with the neighbor kids. The oldest ones got the hang of it pretty well, but the younger ones lost patience with having to hold the walls together until the icing hardened. Miles’ house soon became a teepee.

And the green sprinkles? Were a bad idea. “A little goes a long way” means squat to kids. Meanwhile, the babies screamed for M&Ms and everyone spit out the (partially chewed) gumdrops because they tasted “gross.”

I wised up by the next time, and bought a couple of foam gingerbread house kits from Michael’s (see photo). The interlocking foam pieces fit together easy enough and then the kids decorated them with the enclosed stickers. Easy-peasy. And the only clean-up was collecting the sticker backings. No sprinkle tsunamis. AND no sugar-shock.

Our final creative masterpiece was a snowman cake. When my MIL gave me the pan last year I remember thinking, “When the heck does she think I’m going to have time to make THIS?!” But then the baby started sleeping through the night and taking 2.5-hour naps and all of a sudden the possibilities were endless. Or at least baking a cake no longer seemed on par with writing a novel in Russian.

I’m proud to say I even let Miles help this year. I didn’t get all control-freakish and take all the fun out of it for him like last year. Even if he did put the snowman’s buttons a tad too close together and one of his eyes is on his forehead. HAHAHAHA, just kidding!! It didn’t bother me! Much.

I guess there’s a little Martha in me after all.

CRAFT O' THE WEEK: Keep it simple, and non-holiday-specific, with Anchormommy's Winter Mitten Garland.

VIDEO O’ THE WEEK: Check out Jen Singer’s “The 12 Days of Christmas Break” video on Mommasaid.net. Funny AND true.

Random Thoughts: Holiday Edition

Would people look at me funny if I swabbed down the entire holiday train garden with Purell before I let my kids near it?

Would those parents over there get offended if I handed their kid a tissue?

It’s pretty amazing how coughing and sneezing into your elbow has become common practice. Kind of like sitting “crisscross-applesauce” or “like a pretzel” have almost universally replaced “Indian-style.”

Why do some kids love mall Santas and my kids won’t go near them? I think they’d actually prefer going to the dentist.

Will my toddler's obsession with the Christmas tree ever wear off? Or will he not rest until he’s pulled every single ornament off the tree? (We’ve already lost at least 3 to his death grip. RIP, Rudolph.)

When did sending out Christmas cards with professional photos on 100-lb. cardstock become the norm? Some of the ones we’ve gotten are nicer than our wedding invitations.

Does every married couple give each other boring gifts for Christmas, like a new Dirt Devil or a wireless earpiece for their cell phone, or is it just us?

Why would anyone beyond my immediate family ever try to give me clothes? I don’t even let my husband buy me clothes unless it’s a specific item I’ve already picked out.

Why is my 4-year-old son so damn picky about his clothes? Would it kill him to wear a sweater vest and shoes that aren’t Crocs? Is he worried the wrong outfit will ruin his image at preschool?

Will the gifts my boys get when they’re young shape their future identities? My toddler’s getting a play kitchen and a toy stroller. Will he grow up to be a chef? A stay-at-home dad? Or just a regular guy who makes pancakes on Saturdays and takes his kids to the playground?

Is my 4yo old enough this year to notice or care how many presents he and his brother each get, and how big they are? I hope not. Because the toys seem to get smaller the older they get.

How far should we go to prove that Santa is real? Is eating the cookies enough? Or do we need to disguise the handwriting on the gift tags, too? (This is how I discovered my mom was Santa, BTW.)

Will I be able to get over my fear of germs, Christmas card envy, gift angst, and other assorted seasonal stresses and enjoy the holidays this year? I think so.

LINK O’ THE WEEK: Check out this slideshow of ugly Christmas sweaters. And you thought your mother-in-law’s was bad?

Dora, Glee, and a CD Giveaway

You know what gets my kids and me through the long, dark, dreary days of winter? Music! (You thought I was going to say TV and wine, didn’t you? Those help, too.) So when a lovely lady at Sony Music offered to send me review copies of some CDs, I said you betcha.

My 4-year-old and I opened the package together. The first CD he spied was Dora's Christmas He hasn’t let it out of his sight since. We listen to it at home and in the car. Here’s my review in a nutshell: it’s not as annoying as you’d think.

If, like me, you find Dora’s voice about as appealing as colic, rest assured that her upbeat chirping actually lends itself quite well to Christmas carols like “Holly Jolly Christmas,” “Here Comes Santa Claus,” and of course, “Feliz Navidad.” My 22-month-old chimed right in with the fa-la-las and ho-ho-hos. And he went NUTS for a track called “Wiggle Wiggle.”

As for me, I was FAR more excited about Glee: The Music, The Christmas Album
Woot! I can’t explain why I am such a Glee fan, since I was never a drama geek, hate American Idol, and have no desire to relive high school. Something about the music just makes me happy. If loving Glee is wrong, I don’t want to be right. My favorite track is Kurt and Blaine’s rendition of “Baby, It’s Cold Outside.” And Rachel covering Wham’s “Last Christmas” is fun, too.

The CD also includes “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch,” which you may be disappointed to know is not sung by the evilly awesome Sue Sylvester. I guess she’s not much of a singer. Personally, I prefer the original version of that song, which is apparently sung by an artist named Thurl Ravenscroft. (Thank you, Google.)

The CD I’ll be listening to long past Dec. 25 is Glee: The Music, Volume 4
It includes “Empire State of Mind,” “Stronger” and “Toxic” from the Britney episode, “Teenage Dream,” and “Forget You” featuring Gwyneth Paltrow. (Is it just me, or is Gwynnie everywhere all of a sudden? Guess she has one heck of a nanny.)

Sorry, people, but these are mine -– hands off. Since it’s the season of giving, however, I am doing a giveaway for all you fans of The King. (As in Elvis, not the blue character from the animated movie, Cars.) So if you want to get your hands on a shiny, brand-new copy of Viva ELVIS- The Album leave a comment telling me Elvis’ middle name. The first person to guess AND SPELL it correctly, wins.

For the rest of you, check out this funny yet slightly disturbing video of one of the tracks, “Bossa Nova Baby.”

Christmas Card Outtakes

Here are 3 reasons why you may not get a Christmas card from us this year:






Now, look. I’m not one of those people who has to have the perfect fairy-tale family photo on their Christmas card. (Though that does describe about 90% of the cards we receive, I'll point out. Not that I'm jealous or anything.)

But if I’m going to spend the time and money to print and mail dozens of these puppies -- which will adorn mantels and refrigerators all over the country -- I’m just not willing to go the ironic route, OK? My blog is FULL of those kinds of photos.

Is it too much to ask that one measly time a year I capture an image of my children in which they are both looking at the camera? In which no one is crying, pouting, or sitting on his brother? In which no one has a black eye, a visible booger, or marker on their face? In which both kids look cute and like they weren't raised by wolves?

Yeah, I thought so.

Guess we'll just have to work with what we've got.


LINK O' THE WEEK: For cards that may induce jealousy, make you laugh, or give you ideas, check out McMommy's annual McHoliday Card Spectacular. My fave's the one of the 3 kids in the leaves.

Top 5 Toys for Boys

Well, it’s that time of year again. The catalogs are arriving by the dozens, the relatives are asking for gift ideas, and my 4 y.o. son is adding items to his Christmas list daily. (The latest additions: a bathrobe and a lava lamp. Who is he, Hugh Hefner?!)

I don’t generally do gift guides or product reviews mainly because I think they’re completely subjective. Just because MY baby loves his toy toolbox and ignores Sophie the Giraffe doesn’t mean YOUR baby will.

And I can honestly say that just about every “award-winning” book and toy given to my kids has gone straight into the Bin of Neglect—that out-of-the-way toy box containing the stuff your kids don’t really play with but that you can’t bear to get rid of. Because it’s AWARD-WINNING!!

But I can tell you what my kids like. And isn’t word-of-mouth from other moms the best way to get the real scoop on anything? So behold: I present to you 5 toys that are winners in our house. These are toys that my boys and their friends go back to again and again. Toys that I’ve even replaced the batteries in, rather than claiming the toy was “broken.”

Please note that I bought exactly NONE of these, proving that complete strangers have better luck giving my kids gifts than their own mother. Enjoy! Only 48 more shopping days till Christmas...

Cool Tools Activity Set
Age: 18 mos. +
Amazon* Price: $18.99
Part shape-sorter, part toolbox, part catchy-tune player, this toy is a compact kit o’ fun. I love that it has just a handful of parts that click into place and can be closed up inside the box. Years later, we haven’t lost a single piece.

(*Because that's where I usually buy stuff.)


Nesting & Stacking Blocks
Age: 24 mos. – 6 years
Amazon Price: $9.99
These are great because they don’t take up a lot of space and they appeal to kids of almost any age. They can stack them, put things in them, and of course, knock them down. One caveat: they’re cardboard, so they’re not indestructible. But for $10, you can’t complain. We’re on our second set.


Interstar Rings
Age: 2+
Amazon Price: $16.77
Babies can use them as teethers, older kids can build things out of these star-shaped plastic thingies. The shape makes them easy to hold and connect together. We've made towers, spaceships, even silly hats and glasses out of them.





Winnie The Pooh Ride-On Car
Age: 12 mos. – 3 years
Toys R Us Price: $25.89
We have a slightly different one, with a keyboard and some other random stuff on it, but I think just about any ride-on toy would be as appealing. Toddlers can use it as a walker and bigger kids can push it with their feet. And every age likes pushing all the little buttons. Warning: ours plays especially annoying tunes and doesn’t have an off button. Though you could always “lose” the batteries and the car would still work.


Fisher-Price Imaginext DC Super Friends Batcave
Age: 3-7 years
Amazon Price: $37.99
Santa brought this for Miles last Christmas, and he’s been playing with it ever since. I think of it as the boy’s version of a dollhouse. (Though I’ve seen plenty of girls playing with it when they come over, too.) It comes with a whole bunch of little characters and plastic pieces, the smallest of which I confiscated so the baby wouldn’t eat them.

If you’re wondering why there aren’t any wooden toys on this list, it’s because the only wooden toys we own have broken. I can’t recommend any, because they simply don’t hold up in our house. Now off you go. Happy shopping!

And since I have such a terrible track record with my own offspring, please tell me: what toys do YOUR kids like best?

Merry Christmas!

Happy Holidays, everyone! From my family to yours, with love.

Riley's celebrating his first Christmas with his own video:
"The Little Drummer Boy."

2009 (Gag) Gift Guide

It’s an unfortunate fact of life that I am a lousy gift-giver. Occasionally, I come up with an amazingly perfect, personal, creative gift, such as the year I got my mom a customized antique locket from Etsy containing pictures of her grandchildren. Alas, I cannot sustain that level of gift-giving year after year.

Especially with the men in my life. Do you know how hard it is to buy for my husband? He’s so picky about his apparel I couldn’t DREAM of buying him something he’d actually wear. The Nike watch of ’07 is still a sore subject. Even when he sends me a link to the exact thing he wants, it still somehow goes awry. (It said “unisex,” I swear!!)

[Sidebar: have you noticed the disturbing trend towards “practical” gifts once you’re married? “Honey, let’s get a new garbage disposal and call it our Christmas present to each other this year, OK?” NOT OK!!]

For your convenience, I’ve compiled a list of thoughtful gifts that you and your loved ones will TRULY cherish:

For moms:

Privacy. If a working lock for the bathroom door is not feasible, give her the gift of letting her do her business solo without talking to her through the door. Imagine, an entire shower without someone coming in to ask where the red sippy cup is or flushing the toilet and scalding her.

For dads:

Space. Let him watch the whole game by himself without talking to him about the suspicious-looking crack in the ceiling or the state of your 401k. Allow him to drink his coffee before asking him if he remembered to put out the recycling and what you should get his mom for her birthday. Don’t hand him a crying baby and a whiny toddler before he’s even fully in the door from work. At least let him turn off the engine first.

For grandparents:

Satisfaction. As in, give them the satisfaction of thinking you are taking their advice – or at least considering it. When they say, “We used to put you kids in playpens” or “Give the baby a bottle of water when he cries at night” or “Don’t give in to those temper tantrums; show her who’s boss,” just smile and nod. Bonus points for throwing in a “Why didn’t *I* think of that?”

For babies:

Access. Every parent knows the more dangerous the object, the more a baby wants it and the longer and more happily he will play with it. So let him have your germy keys, those sharp kitchen implements, and the dog’s filthy chew-toy. He’ll be in heaven, and you’ll be on standby with the Purell, ready to call 911 if necessary.

For toddlers & preschoolers:

Independence. Imagine an entire day where your child gets to make all his own decisions. The striped shirt with the plaid shorts and Elmo rain boots? Why not! Waffles and M&Ms for breakfast? Sure! A 4-hour Dora marathon? Go nuts! What’s the worst that could happen? Cavities? Public ridicule? A nuclear meltdown? You’ll live. Of course, MY son has been known to ask to drive the car, play in traffic, and drink Red Bull, so you’ll have to draw the line somewhere.

I see these gifts as a win-win for everyone. They cost you nothing (except possibly your pride) and you don’t even have to wrap them. Any way you look at it, they’re way more festive than a new muffler for the minivan. Here’s wishing you & yours a happy, stress-free holiday!

PICS O' THE WEEK: "Snow angel? More like snow DEVIL!"









"Check out my disco stroller!"

Seasonal Activity Disorder

This time of year, I am forced to admit that I am one of those people who suffers from SAD. No, not Seasonal Affective Disorder, though I do hate the shorter, darker days of winter. My problem is Seasonal Activity Disorder. Every year, I feel compelled to plan all sorts of fun holiday outings for friends and family—whether or not they actually want to participate. Yes, you WILL go see “The Nutcracker” for the 80 bazillionth time and freeze your cheeks off wobbling around on ice skates for the first time in 10 years! And you will LIKE IT!!

Trouble is, it usually backfires. Take last week, for instance. First some friends and I decided to take our kids to that holiday train garden I mentioned. Afterwards, we’d get pizza. What fun! How festive! Right. Cut to three frazzled moms darting around after their overstimulated offspring, trying to keep them from pushing in front of other kids, licking the glass windows, diving into the fountain in the middle of the food court, and swiping drinks from other people’s tables. Five kids, three moms, all going in different directions. That was Fun Seasonal Activity #1.

Fun Seasonal Activity #2 was my idea. My husband and I would take our son to a live holiday theatre performance. It was just one hour long, specifically geared towards little kids’ attention spans (or lack thereof). Just my luck the play happened to be on the same day as Miles’ school Christmas pageant. So after his classes’, um, “unique” rendition of Jingle Bells, followed by a juice and cookie party, we packed him into the car to go to yet another performance.

I guess it’s not so surprising that he couldn’t sit still through the musical interpretations of Christmas, Kwanzaa, and Hannukah tales. He was more interested in flipping the theatre seats up and down than in watching the actors. And this is the same kid who will sit with rapt attention through his 257th viewing of “Cars.” As for my husband? He fell asleep almost immediately. So much for culture.

Then there was the family outing to a local holiday lights display. We should’ve stayed in the car and done a drive-by. Battling the crush of revelers and flashbulbs while trying to keep a grip on a 3-foot-tall person’s mittened hand put me in a less than merry mood. Plus, it was damn cold out there!!

So did I learn my lesson and resolve to stay home, curled up on the couch with a mug of hot cocoa? I did not. My parents are visiting this week, and I have a list of activities ready. I can’t stand the idea of sitting around the house every day staring at each other.

Though even I have to admit, the grandparents seem pretty happy just sitting around staring at (or chasing after, or feeding, or reading to) their grandson. And Miles is perfectly happy with his usual non-seasonal activities of tormenting the dog, jumping on furniture, and acting out fairy tales with his stuffed animals. But how can I sit at home when I know there are Christmas concerts and holiday spectaculars and breakfasts with Santa going on out there? SAD is a real sickness, I tell you.

Happy Holidays, everyone!!

LINK O’ THE WEEK: Track Santa on his magical flight around the world on Christmas eve. And check out some more fun activities on this page.

Toddler Holiday Traditions

Watching holiday specials on TV. Am I the only parent who forgot that in the animated version of “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” there’s a scary Snow Monster who terrorizes the innocent woodland creatures? I’m afraid I inadvertently gave my son nightmares. I didn’t know! I thought it was a family-friendly movie. Though why Miles is afraid of a silly-looking monster and not Jim Carrey’s creepy version of the Grinch is beyond me.

Getting the Christmas tree. This year, Miles went with some friends of ours to cut down their tree at a farm in the country. He had a blast. But the next day when my husband took him to pick out a tree for us, instead of enjoying a fun day out with Dad, Miles threw a fit. “I just already did get a tree yesterday!!” Sor-RY.

Sitting on Santa’s lap. There’s a very authentic Santa (Real beard! Velvet suit!) who visits a mall near us. Too bad for Santa, this mall also does an amazing holiday train display -- much more of a draw for a 2-year-old boy. Just as well. I’m afraid a visit to Santa would’ve turned into the Pony Ride Debacle all over again. Last summer, we waited in a long line (twice!) for Miles to ride a pony (his idea), only to have him freak out at the last minute.

Making a gingerbread house. So maybe it wasn’t such a great idea to heap piles of candy, cookies & frosting in front of a toddler. I mean, what did I expect? I’m not proud to admit that this would-be enjoyable holiday project took a bad turn, with me shouting: “Don’t touch that wall, you’re knocking it over! NO MORE CANDY!! Stop it, Miles, it’s just to look at!!” Then after he went to bed, I spent hours piping frosting onto roof tiles & giving myself gestational diabetes eating the extra candy. Fun times.

Taking the Christmas card photo. My son can be a bit temperamental at times. He wasn’t into getting his photo taken at the Festival of Trees. Like I said, he had no interest in sitting on Santa’s lap. There’s no snow, and I haven’t finished putting up my decorations. All this adds up to a lack of seasonal photo ops. Meaning I just ended up picking some random photo and ordering our cards from Snapfish before the free shipping offer ended.

Participating in the Christmas pageant. OK, this one hasn’t happened yet, but I’m greatly looking forward to seeing Miles and his classmates march down the aisle singing “Jingle Bells” in the school pageant. He’s been practicing at home. The “... sleigh -- hey!” is his favorite part.

TIP O’ THE WEEK: Craft stores like Michael’s & A.C. Moore are the place to find unbelievable bargains this time of year. Gift bags for 30 cents? Ribbon for 59 cents? 50 yards of wrapping paper for $1.99? Cute ornaments for pennies apiece? Plus 50% off coupons in every day’s paper? I’ll take it!