Week 17: Jump on the Baby Bandwagon

Once I became pregnant I started noticing pregnant women everywhere – at the grocery store, at the airport, at the mall. Were they there all along and I just never paid attention? In addition to the profusion of pregnant strangers, I also suddenly have a whole bunch of friends and acquaintances who are expecting. It’s like one started the trend, and then the rest jumped on the baby bandwagon.

First to announce the news was my friend T., pregnant with her second child, and just one week ahead of me. Then there’s J.G., due a month before me, and J.P., due two weeks after me. Pregnancy pals, how fun!

At a recent party, the conversation focused on J.G.’s newly visible bump and the search for cute maternity clothes. J.P. mixed up special non-alcoholic cocktails so we could at least pretend we were drinking champagne. And A., recently married and trying to get pregnant, listed with rapt attention as we recounted every last symptom and swelling. It’s nice to have a captive audience. Husbands and non-moms have a low threshold for that kind of talk.

It is nice to feel like you have companions as you progress through your pregnancy. The veterans are a little more laid-back, a lot more focused on what comes after the birth than the stuff leading up to it. That’s normal, I guess. Talking about the “terrible twos” beats gruesome birth stories any day. (Which many women are all too happy to share with you, whether they’re invited to or not.)

But I especially like chatting with the rookie moms-to-be like me. “Is your belly button sticking out yet?” we’ll ask each other. “What’s all this talk about food cravings? I haven’t had any, have you?” It’s uncharted territory for us, and endlessly fascinating. It’s heartening to hear that someone else is having similar experiences, and it’s also interesting to hear how pregnancy is different from person to person. (Thank god I didn’t have much morning sickness! How weird that no one else is constipated.)

This week, I think I felt the baby move for the first time. I say “I think” because most books will tell you that you won’t feel any “quickening,” as they call it, until at least week 20. But I keep feeling a sort of bumping, bubbly feeling in my lower abdomen. I suppose it could be gas, but it feels … different, somehow. J.G. says people described it to her as butterflies in your stomach, but she likens it more to a bug crawling around inside you. “It’s kind of gross,” she admits.

It is sort of weird to feel the first stirrings of what seems to be an alien life form growing inside of you. But also reassuring, in a way. I’m finally starting to believe there’s a real baby in there! Now if only my husband would start getting a clue … I’m still waiting for the foot massages and breakfast in bed.