12/12/10

Modern Love Notes by Married People

I was going through the messages on my phone the other day when I noticed that these were the last 3 texts I sent my husband:

- I need u 2 come home. I just threw up. Sorry.

- I’m bleeding. When will u b home?

- Still no power. Supposed 2 b back on by now.

And they say romance is dead! Forget sexting and flirty e-mails when you’re married with kids. It’s all about what’s wrong, what to get at the store, and when will you be home. At least in my world. Aren’t you jealous you’re not married to me? ;)

The first text was sent on a Friday night when, unfortunately for all of us, I got hit suddenly with the stomach bug at the exact same time my husband was at a work happy hour and the boys needed to be bathed and put to bed.

The second text was sent while C. was on his way home from work and Riley had just dive-bombed me on the couch, cracking his rock-hard skull into my face and giving me a bloody nose. That was it for me that day. Done. Your turn, Daddy.

The third text was sent while Miles and I huddled inside the idling car in front of our house and Riley napped inside, so I could charge my cell phone during a freak 6-hour power outage on an 28-degree day.

I’m telling you, people, nobody prepares you for this stuff. When I pictured myself all grown up and married with kids, I certainly didn’t factor in these unsavory scenarios. I thought it was going to be all “Love you, sweetie!” and “Hi, honey, how was your day?” and “Let’s grab sushi on the way to the foreign film fest.” (OK, I just made that up. I don’t think we ever did that even in our single days.)

I certainly didn’t imagine that I would be away from my spouse 10+ hours a day, communicating about bodily fluids and grocery lists via text message. (Pls don’t forget 2 buy COFFEE!!) It would be nice if we could send each other sweet little love notes throughout the day, but come on. Who’s got the time? (I DO frequently send C. cute pics of the boys from my phone, however. I figure it makes him feel like he’s not missing out on everything that goes on while he’s at work. Like the bloody noses.)

And anyway, it’s not just me. Check out the latest text I got from my husband, who took Riley to the doctor the other morning:

- Double ear inf. On our way home.

One day we’ll collect these missives and bind them into a book with flower petals pressed between the pages, titled “Love Notes.” Or not.

LINK O' THE WEEK: If you haven't seen DamnYouAutoCorrect.com, what are you waiting for? Hilarious iPhone fails and auto-correct horror stories.

6 comments:

leila said...

This IS hilarious. It's exactly what Married With Children is really like. I'm so glad I found your blog almost three years ago :)

Rebecca Einstein Schorr said...

Whew...relieved to discover that PC and I are not the only ones whose texts are so utterly....domestic.

K. Elizabeth @ YUMMommy said...

My hubby and I have texted lots of those same modern love notes to each other. LOL. I'm trying to get better and buying him cards just because and sending him cute little emails but with a busy two year old and battling morning sickness I've been really slacking.

angie mizzell said...

I think this post could be a title of a book written by one of my favorite bloggers. Just sayin'.

Shannon @ AnchorMommy said...

Ha! I am so happy to hear that other people do this. My hub and I don't text however (I know, what kind of person AM I???). I just call him nearly every day at 5:30, trying to disguise the desperation in my voice when I say, "When will you be home?" Maybe I should start texting...perhaps I'd be less annoying?

That puke report text made me laugh out loud!

Stuff Parents Need said...

So funny! My last text to my hubs was, "non smokers want to move in jan 1" in reference to some potential tenants for our empty house. So it was good news, at least! Though certainly not romantic!

Related Posts with Thumbnails